i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
My cat gives me a boner
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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