wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
