So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
