The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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