we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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