how can u be prego again
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
