its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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