Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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