In the future we'll all be gay
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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