umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
