I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize