I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
