everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
please don't ironically join a cult
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