Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
