Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize