she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
