another moral hangover. fuck.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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