i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize