pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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