I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
