it wasn't lemon gatorade
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
