redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
