More tranny stories later!
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
