you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
