She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
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Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
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The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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