I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You did what with his pubic hair?
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