sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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