i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Dignity is for republicans.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
