It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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