OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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