Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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