can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.