Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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