So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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