super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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