Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
