office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize
