No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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