i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
