Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.

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(206): View more from Washington

Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.

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(720): View more from Colorado

If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?

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(904): View more from Florida

My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones

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(616): View more from Michigan

I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.

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(520): View more from Arizona

He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!

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