Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
