I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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