It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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