K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
