Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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