would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
