I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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