Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
