I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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