i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
40s are totally the cure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize